#1: The endless scroll

On traditional social media and being a 20-something finding herself.

Something new.

Entering my early 20s, I’ve found myself consumed with the endless scroll of Instagram, TikTok, and some occasional Facebook. In a time of my life when I need to find myself, is traditional social media really beneficial to me?

Recently, I’ve found myself struggling with depression much more than I have in my entire life. School is long and suddenly became very hard to manage. Of course, I recognize how fortunate and privileged I am to have the opportunities I have. I get to go to college basically for free, I’ve studied abroad twice, and I have a wonderful close circle of friends. Not everyone gets that lucky at my age. However, mental illness does not discriminate and does not care how good or bad of a go you’ve had at life. How much is traditional social media playing into that?

Of course there is the arguments of staying connected with loved ones and old friends. That’s where this little blog/newsletter/new social media/what-have-you comes in. Now, don’t get me wrong. I am your regular run-of-the-mill STEM student, so I have never been much of a writer. I have always wanted to start and keep a consistent journal. I have piles and piles of unfinished (and probably not even halfway filled) journals starting from the ripe ole’ age of 5. The closest I have gotten to that journal goal is my 2015 “Keep Calm and Carry On” journal, which I have found myself reading aloud to whoever will listen for comedy purposes (I’m sorry 13 year old Syd, that little crush was not as heartbreaking as you made it sound).

Now, I am finding myself in a point in my life where I am constantly looking ahead. My mind is a constant blurb of “How can I strengthen my vet school application? What if I do not get in? What do I do then? When will I reach my body goals? How can I afford a house one day? A car? A family? Will I even be happy and fulfilled if I have all these things?”. Of course the future is important and planning is necessary, but what happens when you are focusing on life in the future but not the right-now? As many many many cliche movies and TV shows say, the present is a gift.

All of that being said, I want to be able to keep my focus on my life now, and not my life in 10 years. Between school, my mental health, the state of the country, and every other daily inconvenience, why do I also tack on constantly worrying about the uncertainty of the future? That is where I hope all this will come in.

Traditional social media (especially Instagram) has been my main point of life-sharing since I was maybe 11? Hell, I had a Facebook account since I was 8! It’s easy to get caught up in the short captions, pretty pictures, memes, vacation photos, etc. Of course there is always the argument of keeping up with friends and family, especially ones who live far away. I agree! That is probably the only reason I still have a Facebook! But, let’s be honest; it’s not healthy. Comparing our lives, bodies, humor, you name it to every other person on the planet is not sustainable.

I was recently introduced to this idea by an old friend from my freshman year of high school, Asha (who was a senior I think). She was always someone I looked up to at 14 years old, so I’ve tried to keep up with her adventures over the years via Instagram. I was introduced to the idea of a newsletter or blog as a main form of sharing/social media through hers. It seemed so simple but somehow I had never thought about it before. Newsletters are for PTA parents and blogs are for Christian soccer moms, what use would a twenty-something like me have for it? Well, after reading a few of her newsletters, I became enamored by the idea of it all. What a better way to keep your friends and family updated, while also staying away from the toxic traditional social media atmosphere. Not only that, but a long-form writing type thing like this paints a more intimate picture and can spark meaningful conversations between me and my “readers”. Could this also function as a sort of journal? That is what I’m hoping.

Will this end up being something I use two or three times then give up on? Probably. Is this just another hyper-fixation? Most likely. But I want to try. I want to do this for myself and my health. I want to be able to share my life in a more meaningful way, while also taking care of myself. Two birds, one stone.

What would make this more powerful is if others did it as well. Asha influenced me, maybe I can influence others. Substack is a great website to keep up with your favorite newsletters (hopefully like this one), and you can even make your own. I love to read about everyone else’s meaningful life twists and turns. I find comfort in the realness of it all. Sometimes it’s hard to realize that everyone around you is not just an NPC in the game of life. Less pictures on the endless scroll, more like people. It’s humanizing. I hope everyone does something like this one day.

Soup for Thought

For those of you who might not have known me for very long, I really like to milk the fact that my last name is Campbell. People ask my last name? “Campbell, like the soup”. Hence the name of this new blog-newsletter-thingy. Idk, I think it’s funny.

Fun little logo for this I made on my favorite website: Canva

Someone actually made it this far?

More likely than not, no one will ever read this, but I am okay with that. If someone is actually reading this and you made it this far, thank you. We’re on this journey together and I’m glad someone else is interested enough to be reading this silly little thing I’m doing.

I am hoping that with the help of this transition from the endless scroll to wholesome blogging, I can be present and grounded. I hope I can influence others to do the same through this as well.

**PS, I wanted to get rid of the “add paid subscribers” option that was taking up half my dashboard. I went ahead and added a paid option, the only benefit is that all proceeds go to Not One More Vet which aims to prevent suicide in the veterinary field. Thanks!

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